Gold Sorcerer Buys the Secrets of Chemistry (shitpost)
By Sir Bunting on April 21, 2024 8:11 pm
I wanted to use these samples for fun, again. Literally only made this to entertain myself so.. anyway..
Attributions go to Age of Empires 2 HD
DEVELOPER: Skybox Labs, Hidden Path Entertainment, Ensemble Studios, Forgotten Empires
PUBLISHER: Xbox Game Studios
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and of course the SpongeBob audio is owned by Nickelodeon, subsidiary of Paramount Global.
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and of course the Dynasty Warriors 3 audio is owned by Koei Tecmo
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The story of my song follows the Gold Sorcerer, who invades Iberia (I have nothing against Iberia) but replaces the word Iberia with gold because that's all he thinks about. And then he creates a racket with his gold magic which increases the price of the Byzantine merchants' "The Secrets of Chemistry" from 500 to 2000 gold. There is nothing William Wallace can do; he is mind-controlled mid-sentence with the chimes of gold. And then the Gold Sorcerer strikes again, for gold. Alas, war never changes. There is an army of rams, which the Gold Sorcerer defeats by possessing magic gold so golden that it causes the ram pushers to scream "MY EYES! MY EYES!" and veer off-course. The glorious commander is defeated. Then another merchant who changes accent halfway through speaking tells the Gold Sorcerer about an island of gold and he sails there, having amassed great quantities of gold and yet pursues more. It's a really deep story.
Audio works licensed by author under:
CC0 Creative Commons Zero (Public Domain)