autonomy
By emily on May 8, 2022 1:50 pm
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WeeklyBeats.com / Music / emily's music / autonomy
Very nice track. I do like the "trap" beat with those "warm" synths. Spoken vocals fits really well with instruments.
A bit of a different vibe this week, but the synths and beat are really effective and of course the subject matter is timely. When I was a kid I always thought the future would be an enlightened utopia, but we just seem to be dead set on going backwards. Ugh.
Great electric tenseness and density, a perfect intro to an outbreak, that maybe is following one of the next weeks ...
The dark trap beats (especially the snare) really set the tone and pace with the synth pads. The vocals sit nicely in the mix and really complete the track.
Mental double-take when I saw the artist of this track. The trap + dark synthwave feels like a departure, but the effect is just as evocative (except now it evokes unyielding tension, gravitas, and melancholy). I only caught what most of the vocals were saying the second time through―but once I did, my blood ran cold.
Massive mood piece; feeling thoroughly crushed now.
The track is great, loved it immediately from the opening loop and those hats. The unsettling aspect to the strings, which… well, yes, unsettling is the news cycle, again. I find music to be quite magical most of the times, and it’s really critical that this does not merely lather something dark with magic—this succeeds in all aspects, I feel. The discomfort in the timbres, the lack of resolution, and the on-point you are with your lyrics is haunting, which is the feeling here also. What a crushing dumpster fire of a decade we are living in… 
what does it mean indeed. I can hear in your voice how you've thought a lot more about the implications of that than... well, the people who chose to take that choice away (or, more specifically, the safe options... ). thank you for sharing this. also, it's also been really cool to hear you work with more definitive rhythm this year after the more ambient work you did in 2020.
(I need to rewatch that... the ending felt so triumphant at the time, and now we're moving backwards again, because of course we are.)
a very catchy and solid song. different to your previous work, but very good as well. I like all ingredients you used for this track. (especially the aphex twin "heliosphan" hihat and Kim Gordon on the mic)
I really like this track. The synth have a slight 80s feeling to it, i had some synthwave vibe from them. I find the way vocals/spoken words are added and mixed is really interesting. It's not upfront, more in the back and treated like another piece of instrument. It feels therefore like a voice that is overheard but the words are not clearly understood and the synth lines are actually more important, with their maze like feel of never getting out. It reminds me of being depressed and rehashing something, not being able to get out of it, having voices in the head that do not help.
That is an intriguing track I'll come back to several times, it brings very interesting feelings and emotions.
Wow! This is amazing. The drums blend so well with the bass, chords, and melody. I was instantly drawn into this one.
djippy wrote:
Very nice track. I do like the "trap" beat with those "warm" synths. Spoken vocals fits really well with instruments.
CosmicCairns wrote:
A bit of a different vibe this week, but the synths and beat are really effective and of course the subject matter is timely. When I was a kid I always thought the future would be an enlightened utopia, but we just seem to be dead set on going backwards. Ugh.
zpeisman wrote:
Sweet synths and good tension build here
Tone Matrix wrote:
The dark trap beats (especially the snare) really set the tone and pace with the synth pads. The vocals sit nicely in the mix and really complete the track.
Devieus wrote:
Heavy.
- Spider
J Sangha wrote:
Wow! This is amazing. The drums blend so well with the bass, chords, and melody. I was instantly drawn into this one.
miraclemiles wrote:
Powerful. Thank you for this!
ineff wrote:
Mental double-take when I saw the artist of this track. The trap + dark synthwave feels like a departure, but the effect is just as evocative (except now it evokes unyielding tension, gravitas, and melancholy). I only caught what most of the vocals were saying the second time through―but once I did, my blood ran cold.
Massive mood piece; feeling thoroughly crushed now.
thanks for listening & the thoughtful comments!
Kedbreak136 wrote:
I really like this track. The synth have a slight 80s feeling to it, i had some synthwave vibe from them. I find the way vocals/spoken words are added and mixed is really interesting. It's not upfront, more in the back and treated like another piece of instrument. It feels therefore like a voice that is overheard but the words are not clearly understood and the synth lines are actually more important, with their maze like feel of never getting out. It reminds me of being depressed and rehashing something, not being able to get out of it, having voices in the head that do not help.
That is an intriguing track I'll come back to several times, it brings very interesting feelings and emotions.
very insightful ked! - thank you - it feels satisfying to know something i created brings feels!
Q-Rosh wrote:
a very catchy and solid song. different to your previous work, but very good as well. I like all ingredients you used for this track. (especially the aphex twin "heliosphan" hihat and Kim Gordon on the mic)
wow - this comment put me in the company of aphex twin & kim gordon!!! thank you!
Uferland wrote:
Great electric tenseness and density, a perfect intro to an outbreak, that maybe is following one of the next weeks ...
that's a great idea & while it did not work out like that after reading this I listened to flow of this going into week 19's track & i think the pieces would flow for an album 
license wrote:
what does it mean indeed. I can hear in your voice how you've thought a lot more about the implications of that than... well, the people who chose to take that choice away (or, more specifically, the safe options...
(I need to rewatch that... the ending felt so triumphant at the time, and now we're moving backwards again, because of course we are.)
- oh don't you wish the folks in charge had the ability to think more critically & compassionately?
& had space in their minds & hearts for complexity? so many people are hurting from the lack of this!
- new computer in 2021 with updated version of garage-band opened up new tools
- 2022 i have a bit more mental space as 2020 was mostly work created on fumes...
- rhythm seems to take a different amount of mental space from me & i find it so challenging
- have you read "the testaments"?
- it was an interesting addition to the story/curious how the tv series will treat that story line...
- thank you for your thoughtful comment & for listening
ilzxc wrote:
The track is great, loved it immediately from the opening loop and those hats. The unsettling aspect to the strings, which… well, yes, unsettling is the news cycle, again. I find music to be quite magical most of the times, and it’s really critical that this does not merely lather something dark with magic—this succeeds in all aspects, I feel. The discomfort in the timbres, the lack of resolution, and the on-point you are with your lyrics is haunting, which is the feeling here also. What a crushing dumpster fire of a decade we are living in…
this: "it’s really critical that this does not merely lather something dark with magic—this succeeds in all aspects" THANK YOU what a lovely way to put that
do you write? blog i can read? book i can buy?
you are so good with words and so nuanced and detailed and thoughtful (your music is like this also)
let us press on despite the fire... a wise friend likes to remind me when all i can see is how fragile we humans are - how very resilient we can be as well!
emily wrote:
- oh don't you wish the folks in charge had the ability to think more critically & compassionately?
& had space in their minds & hearts for complexity? so many people are hurting from the lack of this!
- new computer in 2021 with updated version of garage-band opened up new tools
- 2022 i have a bit more mental space as 2020 was mostly work created on fumes...
- rhythm seems to take a different amount of mental space from me & i find it so challenging
- have you read "the testaments"?
- it was an interesting addition to the story/curious how the tv series will treat that story line...
- thank you for your thoughtful comment & for listening
- yes 
- ah, that's interesting - I am too shy so far for vocals, and I think you are very brave to do them in almost every track, so I think everyone has horizons they could pursue
- I am embarrassed to admit I have not read any of Atwood's novels. that seems like a good place to start.
- of course, your music is a gift and is one of the highlights of WB for me
P.S. now that Q-Rosh mentioned it, I definitely hear the Kim Gordon too!
I wanted to say also, I remember some of your themes in 2020 and I'm glad you have more mental space and aren't running on fumes now.
license wrote:
I wanted to say also, I remember some of your themes in 2020 and I'm glad you have more mental space and aren't running on fumes now.
Thank you - that's so kind. 
license wrote:
emily wrote:- oh don't you wish the folks in charge had the ability to think more critically & compassionately?
& had space in their minds & hearts for complexity? so many people are hurting from the lack of this!
- new computer in 2021 with updated version of garage-band opened up new tools
- 2022 i have a bit more mental space as 2020 was mostly work created on fumes...
- rhythm seems to take a different amount of mental space from me & i find it so challenging
- have you read "the testaments"?
- it was an interesting addition to the story/curious how the tv series will treat that story line...
- thank you for your thoughtful comment & for listening
- yes
- ah, that's interesting - I am too shy so far for vocals, and I think you are very brave to do them in almost every track, so I think everyone has horizons they could pursue
- I am embarrassed to admit I have not read any of Atwood's novels. that seems like a good place to start.
- of course, your music is a gift and is one of the highlights of WB for me
P.S. now that Q-Rosh mentioned it, I definitely hear the Kim Gordon too!
- ha ha ha!
- now i wanna hear you sing... don't be shy
- i am just rereading handmaids tale this week - it's a LOT less intense than the film/tv show
- i can't even with that last comment - thank you that means a whole lot to me!
emily wrote:
this: "it’s really critical that this does not merely lather something dark with magic—this succeeds in all aspects" THANK YOU what a lovely way to put that
do you write? blog i can read? book i can buy?
you are so good with words and so nuanced and detailed and thoughtful (your music is like this also)
I can't begin to express the gratitude for your compliment: <- this is a generic emoji symbolizing my belief that you can project a better understanding in spite of the missing words.
I don't write much and most of what I wrote is boring and technical. After leaving the comment I realized I was inspired / paraphrasing the words of German composer Helmut Lachenmann. I found the quote: "Speaking in 2010, Lachenmann recalled hearing the radio playing Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony to accompany announcements about soldiers’ deaths at Stalingrad and ‘Siegfrieds Tod’ from Götterdämmerung to mourn Hitler’s death, ‘like a magic to paralyse brains’." Source (text at footnote 35).
One realization I had while studying 20th century music was that atonal music (in post-war Germany) was breaking w/ the traditional classical music in part because of Hitler's appropriation thereof. That at the core of stepping away from tradition was this foundational discomfort of the music-makers with the history that preceded the rise of fascism. (This realization is incomplete without a sobering "it's not as simple as that") I find your music cognizant of the present: sometimes as a protest and sometimes as a contrast to the world we occupy, so maybe the above is interesting: that a generation of composers had to find new ways to rationalize their cultural heritage in light of something haunting...
ilzxc wrote:
emily wrote:this: "it’s really critical that this does not merely lather something dark with magic—this succeeds in all aspects" THANK YOU what a lovely way to put that
do you write? blog i can read? book i can buy?
you are so good with words and so nuanced and detailed and thoughtful (your music is like this also)
I can't begin to express the gratitude for your compliment: <3 <- this is a generic emoji symbolizing my belief that you can project a better understanding in spite of the missing words.
I don't write much and most of what I wrote is boring and technical. After leaving the comment I realized I was inspired / paraphrasing the words of German composer Helmut Lachenmann. I found the quote: "Speaking in 2010, Lachenmann recalled hearing the radio playing Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony to accompany announcements about soldiers’ deaths at Stalingrad and ‘Siegfrieds Tod’ from Götterdämmerung to mourn Hitler’s death, ‘like a magic to paralyse brains’." Source (text at footnote 35).
One realization I had while studying 20th century music was that atonal music (in post-war Germany) was breaking w/ the traditional classical music in part because of Hitler's appropriation thereof. That at the core of stepping away from tradition was this foundational discomfort of the music-makers with the history that preceded the rise of fascism. (This realization is incomplete without a sobering "it's not as simple as that") I find your music cognizant of the present: sometimes as a protest and sometimes as a contrast to the world we occupy, so maybe the above is interesting: that a generation of composers had to find new ways to rationalize their cultural heritage in light of something haunting...
wow - i treasure this reflection so much - thank you - i'm failing again with the words
it feels like a real blessing/gift to have someone consider your work and really understand (& articulate so beautifully!!!) it on the levels you both consciously & unconsciously are creating - thank you for this gift ilzxc! it really means a lot to me.