Dread
By Daisy on October 18, 2022 9:12 am
Dread
"When we have a feeling of dread about something, it makes completing whatever we dread that much harder. We imagine it not going well or we imagine how much we won’t enjoy ourselves and the mental image allows us to feel miserable before the event itself has even occurred." There are some things in life though, no matter how much we dread them, we have to get on with and just do it.-Mandy Kloppers
Fear and Dread- But mostly DREAD. To do I thing that I have had to do before. Not do it is really the fear---To let the situation continue to spiral into something really bad….
I THINK this is about a difficult decision I made this week. I had to tell the truth to someone-- and end a relationship where I was being bullied. Over time the bullying changed from passive-aggressive to outright aggressive as I continued to resist it.
--it was difficult.
I have a test when I feel I have to say something.
1. Does it need to be said.
2. Does it need to be said now.
3. Does it need to be said by me.
In this situation I answered all 3 questions: YES.
I needed to act now.
The beginning of this piece is deciding to speak truth-- wondering how to be kind yet firm, and my struggle to frankly try to get out of doing it.
Then I say it in the trombone line with a crescendo/decrescendo-- there --it’s out!
There could be much more going on in here, like the person being really hurt and unhappy with me, perhaps argumentative (!) and the relief I feel now that it is done.
Audio works licensed by author under:
CC Attribution Noncommercial No Derivative Works (BY-NC-ND)
