self care is important
By scottux on June 7, 2020 11:04 pm
This is another somewhat rushed track this week. Been burning myself out in a million ways, getting no or awful sleep every night, drinking too often, eating poorly, constantly anxious, constantly trying to stay on top of all of what is happening, trying to find a way to reach my parents where they are (incredibly conservative, single issue voters against abortion) to get them to realize they can't keep supporting fascists, trying to reach siblings and their families where they are (some cops in the extended family), trying to reach friends where they are, all of it. I am struggling with the fact that while this is a marathon, I still need to be doing more in the now. I'm going to protests, but I could be going to more. I'm donating, but I could be donating more. I am speaking out and speaking up to white folks about this, but I could be speaking up better or more frequently or have more compassion and change hearts and win minds and all of this is what I should be doing. Work is even taking a hit as I find it really challenging to focus on work when there's Real Work to be done in the world.
It's hard. I don't have the stamina yet. And I need to build it carefully.
So here's an hour of work in Ableton, playing with the notion of slowly burning yourself out on everything.
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