Weeklybeats 2018 was a 52 week long music project in which artists composed and publicly released 1 song a week for the entire year. Enjoy this archive of over 3,700 music compositions by over 260 artists.
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Impostor

By CosmicCairns on December 4, 2018 10:42 pm

Every now and then I'll get an odd little flash of impostor syndrome.  Nothing major, I'll just be at work or something and get this feeling like "What am I doing here?  I'm completely unqualified for this!" or "Why am I attempting to play music?  I have no business picking up an instrument!"  And then it'll usually pass.  I just think it's kind of an interesting phenomenon. 

Lately I've been more in the habit of coming up with a melody and then figuring out a chord progression that matches it, but this time I came up with the chord progression first and then matched it with a melody.  I don't know what difference it makes in the end, but it's fun to change up your process sometimes I guess.   

This submission is licensed by author under CC Attribution Noncommercial (BY-NC)

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December 10, 2018 12:45 am

Hahaha! Lovely!

December 10, 2018 1:13 am

Listening to this made me realize that you're actually Henry Mancini.

December 10, 2018 3:32 pm

Good melodies and instrumentation! Don't worry, you're no fraud, this song alone proves it.

December 10, 2018 6:47 pm
??? wrote:

Hahaha! Lovely!

  Hey thanks!



Jim Wood wrote:

Listening to this made me realize that you're actually Henry Mancini.

  Uh oh... my cover's been blown...



mikememo wrote:

Good melodies and instrumentation! Don't worry, you're no fraud, this song alone proves it.


Thanks I appreciate that.  I think it's just one of those anxiety things that hits once in awhile.

December 11, 2018 12:51 pm

To be fair, anyone else could keep better tempo than you, but that's what's so special about you and your music.

Also, there's no such thing as qualification for making music, you either do or you don't.

I don't know about your job though.

December 11, 2018 3:35 pm
Devieus wrote:

To be fair, anyone else could keep better tempo than you, but that's what's so special about you and your music.

Also, there's no such thing as qualification for making music, you either do or you don't.

I don't know about your job though.

  Oh yeah, I recognize that on an intellectual level.  I for sure never thought it was a rational feeling.  Heck, I feel like a fraud of a human being in general sometimes.  I also don't mean to imply I walk around feeling this way all the time.  It's more of a weird mood I can occasionally get into.  Also I just liked the word "impostor" and wanted to write a song about it.  smile

December 11, 2018 7:40 pm
CosmicCairns wrote:
Devieus wrote:

To be fair, anyone else could keep better tempo than you, but that's what's so special about you and your music.

Also, there's no such thing as qualification for making music, you either do or you don't.

I don't know about your job though.

  Oh yeah, I recognize that on an intellectual level.  I for sure never thought it was a rational feeling.  Heck, I feel like a fraud of a human being in general sometimes.  I also don't mean to imply I walk around feeling this way all the time.  It's more of a weird mood I can occasionally get into.  Also I just liked the word "impostor" and wanted to write a song about it.  smile

That's mighty interesting. Perhaps you can get that checked out, or perhaps you can feel good about how you've managed to fool everyone for as long as you have; it takes a skill all its own to fake, and then live up to, certain qualifications. Things are getting easier even.

But what do I know, I'm not a psychiatrist.

December 11, 2018 10:44 pm
Devieus wrote:
CosmicCairns wrote:
Devieus wrote:

To be fair, anyone else could keep better tempo than you, but that's what's so special about you and your music.

Also, there's no such thing as qualification for making music, you either do or you don't.

I don't know about your job though.

  Oh yeah, I recognize that on an intellectual level.  I for sure never thought it was a rational feeling.  Heck, I feel like a fraud of a human being in general sometimes.  I also don't mean to imply I walk around feeling this way all the time.  It's more of a weird mood I can occasionally get into.  Also I just liked the word "impostor" and wanted to write a song about it.  smile

That's mighty interesting. Perhaps you can get that checked out, or perhaps you can feel good about how you've managed to fool everyone for as long as you have; it takes a skill all its own to fake, and then live up to, certain qualifications. Things are getting easier even.

But what do I know, I'm not a psychiatrist.

  Honestly I feel fine.  It's not something I experience very often.  From what I understand it's not even all that uncommon of a phenomenon and most people will feel it to some degree at some point in their life.  But of course I'm no psychiatrist either.  Like I said it was mostly something I was dwelling on to write a song, not all that different from if I wanted to write a "sad" song.

December 11, 2018 10:54 pm

Well played. I like the theme and lyrics (listened through 3 or 4 times). I've had friends that would say the same thing about feeling like an imposter. They all happened to be artists/musicians but also working in technically demanding fields. And were the smartest people I knew.  They just didn't know it.  You know, your guitar lead melody has a similar feel to your cello playing.  I like that smile

December 12, 2018 9:27 pm
NWSPR wrote:

Well played. I like the theme and lyrics (listened through 3 or 4 times). I've had friends that would say the same thing about feeling like an imposter. They all happened to be artists/musicians but also working in technically demanding fields. And were the smartest people I knew.  They just didn't know it.  You know, your guitar lead melody has a similar feel to your cello playing.  I like that smile

  That definitely makes sense.
Violin was actually my first instrument, but then I switched to cello and took lessons for a long time when I was younger.  I've never taken any formal guitar lessons, I just sort of picked it up along the way and applied what I knew from cello to it.

December 13, 2018 8:17 am

Lovely stuff... I really like that e-guitar melody you have there in the middle section. Great structure in this.

December 13, 2018 4:22 pm

Great compo, very positive and warm, I like the added brightness from the harp-like plucks! Agreed 100% that it is fun to switch up the composing process, I do that often too. When you're going for 52 tracks in a year I don't think anything is out of the question to get inspired!

From what I've been told, impostor syndrome is mostly just a side-effect of being very critical of your creations and actions. I have a hard time dealing with that myself on a regular basis but it's getting better, I think it will always be there to some extent but recognizing where it stems from is a step in the right direction.

December 14, 2018 9:02 pm
Ashen Simian wrote:

Lovely stuff... I really like that e-guitar melody you have there in the middle section. Great structure in this.

Thanks!  I like that part, too.



Gab Manette wrote:

Great compo, very positive and warm, I like the added brightness from the harp-like plucks! Agreed 100% that it is fun to switch up the composing process, I do that often too. When you're going for 52 tracks in a year I don't think anything is out of the question to get inspired!

From what I've been told, impostor syndrome is mostly just a side-effect of being very critical of your creations and actions. I have a hard time dealing with that myself on a regular basis but it's getting better, I think it will always be there to some extent but recognizing where it stems from is a step in the right direction.

  I think it's easy to fall into habits and it's probably good for the creative juices to switch things up once in awhile.  Also, I agree that we can probably be hypercritical of ourselves.  But I also think I'm my own biggest fan so it comes out in the wash somewhere.  smile

December 16, 2018 7:56 pm

this stuffed animal is a fraud/imposter - you sir are not smile

December 18, 2018 1:23 am

woah, you lasered in on a feeling with this song. so very nice! i'll be listening to this again

December 18, 2018 1:50 am
kaedo sevaada wrote:

this stuffed animal is a fraud/imposter - you sir are not smile

  Thanks for a smile-inducing gif.



cfurrow wrote:

woah, you lasered in on a feeling with this song. so very nice! i'll be listening to this again

  Thanks!  Yeah, just trying to capture a weird oddly specific mood.  smile

December 21, 2018 3:30 pm

I hear ya on that feeling and the chorus def makes you feel it.  Excellent ending and so catchy!

December 21, 2018 7:00 pm
Tone Matrix wrote:

I hear ya on that feeling and the chorus def makes you feel it.  Excellent ending and so catchy!

  Thanks!  Appreciate it.

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